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Sebab Depresi Tak Sebercanda Itu

MALAM itu, saya sedang menghadiri ulang tahun teman saya di apartemennya. Musik diputar merayakan hari bahagia Anastasia, seorang kawan dari Rusia. Lalu sebuah pesan masuk di hape.

Saya membukanya dan tiba-tiba iringan musik seperti berhenti berputar. Hening. Sahabat baik saya yang lain di tanah air meninggal. Tiba-tiba. Bunuh diriki, menurut kabar. Beritanya muncul di sebuah media online.

Tentu langsungka teringat sama dia. Perasaan dia baik-baik saja sebelumnya. Setidaknya dari postingan-postingan di sosial medianya tampak ia seperti biasa. Ceria. Tidak ada ji masalah.

Saya terkadang masih sempat saling membalas komentar. Bahkan dia masih sempat bertanya kapan balik. Tetapi begitu mi kapang. Tekanan pekerjaan, keluarga, percintaan, dan hal-halnya yang selama ini terpendam ‘meledak’ menghabisi dirinya. Saya kemudian tahu dari sahabat dekatnya yang lain.

Selama ini biasa ja memang dengar kabar bunuh diri. Saya tidak terlalu menanggapinya hingga sahabat saya sendiri adalah satu di antaranya dan merasakan kehilangan yang amat.

Cerita tentang stres sering saya dengar dari teman-teman sesama mahasiswa perantau. Seorang teman yang kuliah di salah satu kampus ternama di New York menceritakan bagaimana ia sempat meninggalkan kuliahnya selama satu semester.

Nilainya anjlok dan tekanan kian membesar. Berbulan-bulan lamanya dihabiskan di kamarnya saja, minum, merokok, sampai terdapat pikiran untuk bunuh diri. Beruntungki masih sempat mengatasinya.

Topik bunuh diri di kalangan mahasiswa pernah menjadi ramai di sosial media setelah Endri, awardee LPDP di Lund University, Swedia, menceritakan pengalamannya. Setidaknya tiga kali ia berusaha mengakhiri hidupnya.

Beruntung gagal. Satu jenis kegagalan yang harus disyukuri.

Tak mudah bercerita jujur mengakui kita dalam keadaan stres dan depresi dalam kultur sosial kita. Banyak sekali yang memilih diam dan memendamnya.

Malah kalau ada biasa curhat mau cerita entah langsung atau di sosial media, alih-alih temannya perhatian, justru mereka langsung meledek.

Bukti bahwa banyak di antara kita yang memendam depresi tampak jelas ketika Endri berani mengakui pengalamannya di sosial media. Dari sana bermunculan mereka yang pernah atau sedang merasakan keinginan untuk bunuh diri dan sedikit demi sedikit mengungkapkan pengalaman serupa.

Padahal dulunya mereka memilih memendamnya rapat-rapat.

Saya membaca kisah Endri sebelum berangkat studi ke Amerika Serikat. Saya mengerti bahwa stres dapat menggiring ke tindakan bunuh diri.

Tetapi mengerti ternyata tidak sama dengan mengalami. Meski tidak sampai pada keinginan melakukannya, saya sempat mengalami saat stres yang dapat mengacaukan pikiran dan akal sehat.

Padahal saya selalu merasa percaya diri cukup tangguh untuk menghadapi hal buruk seperti ini.

Tak sedikit di antara teman-teman saya yang merasakan stres atau malah depresi. Hal ini terkuak ketika satu di antara kami mencoba curhat di grup WA kami.

Lalu menyusul teman-teman lainnya. Kami saling cerita, menyemangati, dan memberi pertolongan sebisa mungkin.

Biasanya kami menguatkan untuk tidak ragu datang konsul ke badan konseling dan jangan ragu meminta bantuan ketika membutuhkan. Mengakui stres dan depresi bukanji aib dan dosa.

Kesehatan mental dianggap sebuah hal yang sangat serius bagi kampus-kampus di Amerika sebagaimana di kampus-kampus negara maju lainnya. Kampus selalu mengingatkan untuk tidak ragu dan tidak malu menghubungi atau mendatangi badan konseling.

Mereka menyediakan nomor kontak dan hal-hal preventif yang perlu dilakukan ketika mendapati gejala gangguan mental baik pada diri sendiri atau orang lain. Stres dan depresi dianggap bukan hal main-main. Tidak seperti tanah air, orang stres justru dibilangi perbaiki salat.

Di kampus saya, setiap kali menjelang dan selama musim final di penghujung semester, kampus menyediakan snack, roti, buah, teh atau kopi sampai dibawakan ke perpus segala.

Biasanya diberikan dalam bentuk paket disertai kata-kata motivasi. “You can do it!” misalnya. Kira-kira kalau bahasa Inggris versi Makassarnya, “Ewako cika!

Dukungan juga biasanya datang dari dosen dan staf. Memang ada juga profesor yang justru menyebabkan stres tetapi tak sedikit pula yang sangat suportif dan memahami kondisi psikis mahasiswa. Mereka cukup peka dengan kesehatan mental mahasiswa.

Depresi tak hanya dimonopoli mahasiswa yang merantau ke luar negeri. Depresi tidak memandang di mana. Korbannya tak memihak siapa.

Desember 2018 lalu, dua mahasiswa Universitas Padjadjaran ditemukan tewas bunuh diri. Diduga kuat karena persoalan akademik.

Tahun 2014 seorang mahasiswa Universitas Negeri Makassar ditemukan gantung diri di kamarnya. Ada banyak kasus bunuh diri yang terjadi di sekitar kita. Suatu tanda gangguan jiwa ini bukan persoalan sepele belaka.

Sayangnya sebab dalam masyarakat kita –yah itu tadi- stres dan depresi masih belum mendapat perhatian sepenuhnya.

Mereka yang stres lalu mencoba untuk curhat seringkali justru dianggap cemeng, tidak kuat iman, dan reaksi serupa yang justru semakin memperparah situasi kejiwaan.

Bunuh diri bahkan sering dianggap sebagai lelucon ketimbang tragedi. Barangkali kita sering mendapati berita terkait mahasiswa yang bunuh diri karena stres mengerjakan skripsi.

Beritanya dibagikan diiringi emoji tertawa. Sungguh bunuh diri bukan hal lucu, sama sekali bukan. Bunuh diri tak sebercanda itu bosku.

Studi dari Student Minds mencatat beberapa masalah terkait kesehatan mental seperti takut dihakimi orang lain, sulit menemukan teman cerita yang cocok, sulit menemukan seseorang yang bisa membantu, konsentrasi terganggu sampai takut kesepian.

Kita umumnya tumbuh dan dibesarkan dalam lingkungan seperti ini. Hal ini terus terbawa bahkan ketika kuliah di luar negeri. Padahal di setiap kampus, mereka menyediakan layanan kesehatan mental. Stres dianggap sebagai hal yang serius dan ditangani secara serius. Mereka membantu bantuan konseling psikis gratis.

Tetapi karena kita telah tumbuh dalam budaya seperti itu, tak jarang kita masih tak berani berkonsultasi. Dalam mental kita selalu muncul perasaan malu dan takut dihakimi seperti yang sering diterima dalam masyarakat kita.

Padahal stres memicu depresi apalagi bunuh diri tak perlu terjadi jika kita semua peka terhadap orang-orang di sekitar kita. Ka dak susah ji kapang berempati.

Mereka yang stres seringkali mauji didengarkan dan ditemani cerita. Apalagi jika mereka jauh dari orang keluarga dan kampung halaman. Mereka rentan sekali kesepian dan mendorong tindakan bunuh diri.

Saya yakin meluangkan waktu untuk mendengarkan dengan telinga dan hati orang-orang terdekat dapat membantu mereka meringankan beban psikis. Bunuh diri itu sungguh nyata dan sewaktu-waktu bisa mengancam siapa saja, termasuk orang terkasihmu yang selalu kau kira baik-baik saja.

Jangan sampai bunuh diri pi baru menyesal. Apa pi kalau begitu bosku.

Nabilang orang Bugis-Makassar kaDepression is a killer without face.

Arief Balla

Sedang menempuh studi master TESOL and Applied Linguistics di Southern Illinois University Carbondale, Amerika Serikat dengan beasiswa Fulbright.

456 comments

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  • Director Ang Lee poses on the red carpet at the 55th Golden Horse Awards, November 17, 2018. /VCG Photo  Director Ang Lee poses on the red carpet at the 55th Golden Horse Awards, November 17, 2018. /VCG Photo

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  • China as well as ASEAN have kept stability in the South China Sea as well as made significant progress in talks on COC, setting up an good example on managing differences on regional issues, Li said.

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  • Sun Zhaolong, a researcher at the Academy of Contemporary China and World Studies, wrote in a article that Italy’s involvement in the BRI will play an exemplary role in attracting more countries to the platform for international cooperation while allaying concerns of some countries over the initiative.

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  • China and ASEAN already reached a Declaration on the Conduct of the Parties in the South China Sea (DOC) years ago, as well as have been seeking a more robust code of conduct.

  • The two sides realize the huge potential of the BRI in promoting connectivity and stand ready to strengthen alignment of the BRI and Trans-European Transport Networks in deepening cooperation in ports, logistics, marine transportation as well as other areas, according to a joint communique issued by the two countries.

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  • Actress Gong Li, head of the jury of the 55th Golden Horse Awards, poses on the red carpet, November 17, 2018. /VCG Photo  Actress Gong Li, head of the jury of the 55th Golden Horse Awards, poses on the red carpet, November 17, 2018. /VCG Photo

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  • Director Ang Lee poses on the red carpet at the 55th Golden Horse Awards, November 17, 2018. /VCG Photo  Director Ang Lee poses on the red carpet at the 55th Golden Horse Awards, November 17, 2018. /VCG Photo

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  • ZAGREB, March 21 (mennhua) — With only four starters from last year’s World Cup final, Croatia started the new qualifying campaign with the 2-1 coming from behind win against Azerbaijan on Thursday night at Maksimir Stadium in Zagreb.

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  • Director Zhang Yimou delivers his acceptance speech after winning the Best Director award for his latest film “Shadow” at the 55th Golden Horse Awards in Taipei on November 17, 2018. /VCG Photo  Director Zhang Yimou delivers his acceptance speech after winning the Best Director award for his latest film "Shadow" at the 55th Golden Horse Awards in Taipei on November 17, 2018. /VCG Photo

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  • Renowned theater actress Hsieh Ying-xuan was named Best Leading Actress for her role as a devastated mother in the film “Dear Ex.” Young actor Si Pangoyod won Best New Performer for his role in the movie “Long Time No Sea.”

  • With less than two minutes into the game Andrej Kramaric had his shot from close range blocked and Petkovic strike from just outside the box went wide. Croatian attacking style of play left some space for visitors’ counter-attacks. Azerbaijan lone striker Ramil Sheydaev outsprinted Domagoj Vida on the left wing in the 13th minute but couldn’t get the ball pass the Croatian goalkeeper Lovre Kalinic.

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  • Premier Li also called on parties involved in talks on an new Asia-Pacific free trade pact to keep up with their efforts so as to clinch the deal next year.

  • Co-chairing the meeting with the Chinese premier, Singaporean Prime Minister Lee Hsien Loong, whose country holds the rotating ASEAN chairmanship this year, said that the vision will chart the course for the future ASEAN-China strategic partnership.

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Tentang Penulis

Arief Balla

Sedang menempuh studi master TESOL and Applied Linguistics di Southern Illinois University Carbondale, Amerika Serikat dengan beasiswa Fulbright.

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