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Sebab Depresi Tak Sebercanda Itu

MALAM itu, saya sedang menghadiri ulang tahun teman saya di apartemennya. Musik diputar merayakan hari bahagia Anastasia, seorang kawan dari Rusia. Lalu sebuah pesan masuk di hape.

Saya membukanya dan tiba-tiba iringan musik seperti berhenti berputar. Hening. Sahabat baik saya yang lain di tanah air meninggal. Tiba-tiba. Bunuh diriki, menurut kabar. Beritanya muncul di sebuah media online.

Tentu langsungka teringat sama dia. Perasaan dia baik-baik saja sebelumnya. Setidaknya dari postingan-postingan di sosial medianya tampak ia seperti biasa. Ceria. Tidak ada ji masalah.

Saya terkadang masih sempat saling membalas komentar. Bahkan dia masih sempat bertanya kapan balik. Tetapi begitu mi kapang. Tekanan pekerjaan, keluarga, percintaan, dan hal-halnya yang selama ini terpendam ‘meledak’ menghabisi dirinya. Saya kemudian tahu dari sahabat dekatnya yang lain.

Selama ini biasa ja memang dengar kabar bunuh diri. Saya tidak terlalu menanggapinya hingga sahabat saya sendiri adalah satu di antaranya dan merasakan kehilangan yang amat.

Cerita tentang stres sering saya dengar dari teman-teman sesama mahasiswa perantau. Seorang teman yang kuliah di salah satu kampus ternama di New York menceritakan bagaimana ia sempat meninggalkan kuliahnya selama satu semester.

Nilainya anjlok dan tekanan kian membesar. Berbulan-bulan lamanya dihabiskan di kamarnya saja, minum, merokok, sampai terdapat pikiran untuk bunuh diri. Beruntungki masih sempat mengatasinya.

Topik bunuh diri di kalangan mahasiswa pernah menjadi ramai di sosial media setelah Endri, awardee LPDP di Lund University, Swedia, menceritakan pengalamannya. Setidaknya tiga kali ia berusaha mengakhiri hidupnya.

Beruntung gagal. Satu jenis kegagalan yang harus disyukuri.

Tak mudah bercerita jujur mengakui kita dalam keadaan stres dan depresi dalam kultur sosial kita. Banyak sekali yang memilih diam dan memendamnya.

Malah kalau ada biasa curhat mau cerita entah langsung atau di sosial media, alih-alih temannya perhatian, justru mereka langsung meledek.

Bukti bahwa banyak di antara kita yang memendam depresi tampak jelas ketika Endri berani mengakui pengalamannya di sosial media. Dari sana bermunculan mereka yang pernah atau sedang merasakan keinginan untuk bunuh diri dan sedikit demi sedikit mengungkapkan pengalaman serupa.

Padahal dulunya mereka memilih memendamnya rapat-rapat.

Saya membaca kisah Endri sebelum berangkat studi ke Amerika Serikat. Saya mengerti bahwa stres dapat menggiring ke tindakan bunuh diri.

Tetapi mengerti ternyata tidak sama dengan mengalami. Meski tidak sampai pada keinginan melakukannya, saya sempat mengalami saat stres yang dapat mengacaukan pikiran dan akal sehat.

Padahal saya selalu merasa percaya diri cukup tangguh untuk menghadapi hal buruk seperti ini.

Tak sedikit di antara teman-teman saya yang merasakan stres atau malah depresi. Hal ini terkuak ketika satu di antara kami mencoba curhat di grup WA kami.

Lalu menyusul teman-teman lainnya. Kami saling cerita, menyemangati, dan memberi pertolongan sebisa mungkin.

Biasanya kami menguatkan untuk tidak ragu datang konsul ke badan konseling dan jangan ragu meminta bantuan ketika membutuhkan. Mengakui stres dan depresi bukanji aib dan dosa.

Kesehatan mental dianggap sebuah hal yang sangat serius bagi kampus-kampus di Amerika sebagaimana di kampus-kampus negara maju lainnya. Kampus selalu mengingatkan untuk tidak ragu dan tidak malu menghubungi atau mendatangi badan konseling.

Mereka menyediakan nomor kontak dan hal-hal preventif yang perlu dilakukan ketika mendapati gejala gangguan mental baik pada diri sendiri atau orang lain. Stres dan depresi dianggap bukan hal main-main. Tidak seperti tanah air, orang stres justru dibilangi perbaiki salat.

Di kampus saya, setiap kali menjelang dan selama musim final di penghujung semester, kampus menyediakan snack, roti, buah, teh atau kopi sampai dibawakan ke perpus segala.

Biasanya diberikan dalam bentuk paket disertai kata-kata motivasi. “You can do it!” misalnya. Kira-kira kalau bahasa Inggris versi Makassarnya, “Ewako cika!

Dukungan juga biasanya datang dari dosen dan staf. Memang ada juga profesor yang justru menyebabkan stres tetapi tak sedikit pula yang sangat suportif dan memahami kondisi psikis mahasiswa. Mereka cukup peka dengan kesehatan mental mahasiswa.

Depresi tak hanya dimonopoli mahasiswa yang merantau ke luar negeri. Depresi tidak memandang di mana. Korbannya tak memihak siapa.

Desember 2018 lalu, dua mahasiswa Universitas Padjadjaran ditemukan tewas bunuh diri. Diduga kuat karena persoalan akademik.

Tahun 2014 seorang mahasiswa Universitas Negeri Makassar ditemukan gantung diri di kamarnya. Ada banyak kasus bunuh diri yang terjadi di sekitar kita. Suatu tanda gangguan jiwa ini bukan persoalan sepele belaka.

Sayangnya sebab dalam masyarakat kita –yah itu tadi- stres dan depresi masih belum mendapat perhatian sepenuhnya.

Mereka yang stres lalu mencoba untuk curhat seringkali justru dianggap cemeng, tidak kuat iman, dan reaksi serupa yang justru semakin memperparah situasi kejiwaan.

Bunuh diri bahkan sering dianggap sebagai lelucon ketimbang tragedi. Barangkali kita sering mendapati berita terkait mahasiswa yang bunuh diri karena stres mengerjakan skripsi.

Beritanya dibagikan diiringi emoji tertawa. Sungguh bunuh diri bukan hal lucu, sama sekali bukan. Bunuh diri tak sebercanda itu bosku.

Studi dari Student Minds mencatat beberapa masalah terkait kesehatan mental seperti takut dihakimi orang lain, sulit menemukan teman cerita yang cocok, sulit menemukan seseorang yang bisa membantu, konsentrasi terganggu sampai takut kesepian.

Kita umumnya tumbuh dan dibesarkan dalam lingkungan seperti ini. Hal ini terus terbawa bahkan ketika kuliah di luar negeri. Padahal di setiap kampus, mereka menyediakan layanan kesehatan mental. Stres dianggap sebagai hal yang serius dan ditangani secara serius. Mereka membantu bantuan konseling psikis gratis.

Tetapi karena kita telah tumbuh dalam budaya seperti itu, tak jarang kita masih tak berani berkonsultasi. Dalam mental kita selalu muncul perasaan malu dan takut dihakimi seperti yang sering diterima dalam masyarakat kita.

Padahal stres memicu depresi apalagi bunuh diri tak perlu terjadi jika kita semua peka terhadap orang-orang di sekitar kita. Ka dak susah ji kapang berempati.

Mereka yang stres seringkali mauji didengarkan dan ditemani cerita. Apalagi jika mereka jauh dari orang keluarga dan kampung halaman. Mereka rentan sekali kesepian dan mendorong tindakan bunuh diri.

Saya yakin meluangkan waktu untuk mendengarkan dengan telinga dan hati orang-orang terdekat dapat membantu mereka meringankan beban psikis. Bunuh diri itu sungguh nyata dan sewaktu-waktu bisa mengancam siapa saja, termasuk orang terkasihmu yang selalu kau kira baik-baik saja.

Jangan sampai bunuh diri pi baru menyesal. Apa pi kalau begitu bosku.

Nabilang orang Bugis-Makassar kaDepression is a killer without face.

Arief Balla

Sedang menempuh studi master TESOL and Applied Linguistics di Southern Illinois University Carbondale, Amerika Serikat dengan beasiswa Fulbright.

53 comments

  • manfaat syekali ma bossss…
    untung pas sahabat saya depresi saya segera cari literatur buat menghadapinya, soalnya jauhan sih kitanya 🙂

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Tentang Penulis

Arief Balla

Sedang menempuh studi master TESOL and Applied Linguistics di Southern Illinois University Carbondale, Amerika Serikat dengan beasiswa Fulbright.

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